Back in the past, I only really enjoyed meeting with people in a one on one context. I didn’t like to meet in large groups of people because I felt that I often didn’t get a proper chance to speak to anyone and I also felt like I was talking over others. I was never truly relaxed in a group; group events would make me feel anxious.
As I grew older and mellowed, I realised that I had no reason to dislike group events. They were a chance to meet up with lots of friends at once which was often very fun and exciting. Seeing so many friends in one go creates a level of excitement which is quite unique. My annual Christmas meals are large group events and they’re some of my favourite things to do.
On the other hand, interactions with groups seem to lack the depth that you’ll find when interacting with people one on one. You can focus all of your attention on one person and have nice long conversations. In a group, I personally feel I’m being spread a little thin – the more people there are, the less the value of each interaction.
It’s a difficult balance to get right, but I think I probably like both equally these days. People act different in small, subtle ways when they’re in a group and you find out more about some people by seeing them interact with you and other people in these different contexts. I think it’s quite important, socially, to interact with people in both one on ones and in groups. They’re different experiences which are both quite valuable and, by doing both, it helps you to appreciate each thing more.
Or, at least, that’s what I think. Everyone’s different, after all and if you find that this doesn’t apply to you then so be it! I would not mean to suggest that my perspective is an objective standard.
