Clubbing

So like I said a few days ago, I recently went to the clubs in the nearby town of Bath with my friends. This is actually the first time I’ve ever done anything like that, so I’ve decided to write up a summary of the experience on here.

Basically, the clubs have their dance-floors underground, most probably, as was pointed out to me, because if the music is coming from underground, the loud noise is mostly contained. I was fairly early at the club, so the dance-floor was almost entirely empty apart from my friends and I. Before long, however, it filled up with people and you know how in an ants nest you have millions of ants all crawling over each other and everything in a very small area? It’s just like that, except it isn’t ants, it’s people, and it isn’t an ants’ nest, it’s a nightclub. It is extremely packed, and as such, extremely hot, especially if you’re wearing a blazer. I don’t tend to sweat all that much on hot days or anything, but down there I felt as if I’d been pushed in a pool, it was so hot that I even had to unbutton ALL of the buttons on my polo shirt.

But the heat isn’t all that bad, I didn’t really mind it. The main problem was that several strangers seemed to be somehow inclined towards me, which was a little strange. The first time was in a bar, which was actually before we went to the clubs. I was talking to my friend when I felt somebody pulling on my boxer shorts, I thought nothing of it and continued talking with my friend, but then it happened again so I turned around.

“I can see your boxers,” said a random female with a strange smile.

“Oh sorry,” I said as I pulled up my trousers. “Please don’t touch my underwear again.”

Luckily, she left me alone after that. Unfortunately, the next two people didn’t even say anything to me, they just spoke with their hands, so to speak… I was enjoying myself on the dance-floor, dancing away and all that crazy stuff, when I was suddenly spanked a couple of times, I span around to see who had done it, hoping that it might be Dalfino (he does stuff like that), but instead it was a second random female. She then winked at me, luckily, I had a plan of how to perfectly handle any situation like that… Specifically my plan was to run away. So I did.

This is the third and final one. After I had ventured back onto the dance-floor, I was again enjoying myself on there. Then suddenly there was a guy who was trying to make his way through the crowd, probably to reach a friend of his or something like that, as he walked past me I felt his hand land on my backside. I thought to myself “That’s a little strange, but I’m sure there’s a logical and innocent, explanation. His hand just probably accidentally landed there on his voyage through the crowds and he’s probably as embarrassed as I am” then his hand squeezed me and it was time to run away again.

Later on I noticed another stranger was staring at me a lot, but I’m sure it could have been purely innocent or nothing at all. So nothing bad came from that, but I was still quite bewildered at how three different people had been so invasive of privacy. It’s the most shocking thing about going to the clubs, and if you’re a light-hearted person, you might want to mentally prepare yourself for it before going…

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