Recently while talking to my friend Elliot Egan, I mentioned to him that the webcam that was built into my laptop was broken. Then, rather kindly, he offered to lend me his Xbox webcam so that I could have a working one for a while.
When he gave it to me, to test it out, I decided to visit the website ChatRoulette (I’ve written about this site before). I don’t really like that website, but it is a good way to give a webcam a little test run. For some bizarre reason, after three people decided that I wasn’t somebody they wanted to talk to, I was suddenly blocked from the site due to being ‘sexually explicit’ and redirected to an even more unpleasant website that I don’t think I’ll go into any detail about. I guess I must have a phallic face or something.
As such, I decided to visit Omegle, which is basically just ChatRoulette but with a different name. During this little ‘test’ period I didn’t really come across many internet perverts, in fact I had several nice chats with several nice people (including Mochammad Restu who sent me those nice photographs). As such, I decided that maybe I was wrong about that kind of website… Maybe they were nice websites for nice people to chat with strangers without being sexually harassed… I was wrong.
So I met a few other nice people, but then I met quite a large number of the perverts and I’ve decided now that there is no way I am ever returning to those websites. The first one was a seemingly normal girl who chatted nice and friendlily. Eventually she said “Can I see your stomach?” I thought this was slightly strange, but briefly lifted my polo shirt upward a little anyway, after all what harm could it do? Then this little exchange happened:
Girl: So what part of me would you like to see?
Me: Oh, I’m fine really. You don’t have to show me any part!
Girl: Heh why do you assume I don’t want to show you?
Me: I’m not assuming that. I just don’t really want you to show me.
(Girl takes off all of the clothes on her upper body)
Girl: You like?
Me: I’m very shocked.
Girl: I noticed 😛 so do you like what you see?
Me: (this was a very difficult question to answer) They’re nice enough, I suppose.
Girl: Thanks (starts to lick boobs)
Me: If you’re gonna have them out, please don’t lick them, it make me a little uncomfortable…
Girl: Okay then. So show me more of yourself 😉
Girl: Show my your [I decided to censor the word, though rhymes with ‘she is’].
Me: Nah I’m good.
Girl: C’mon, please babe, I wanna see it.
Me: Well it’s invisible to the naked eye, so… Anyway, are you not familiar with Omegle? If you disconnect you’ll find loads of guys exposed on camera.
Girl: But I only wanna see yours.
Me: The irony is, I only want you not to see mine.
Girl: Please. I love you.
Me: Wow, I’m glad I’ve had such a good impression on you. But still, no.
Girl: I wanna see you handle it.
Me: (it took me a few moments to realise that this meant the same thing as ‘enjoying yourself’) Nah, that’s worse than just showing you it, so no. Sorry.
Girl: C’mon babe, please show me! I want to see it.
Me: Well do you maybe have some kind of fetish that would mean I can show you a part of my body I can comfortably show you and you’ll be just as aroused?
Girl: (long pause) your tongue.
Me: (pokes out tongue)
(this is just writing from memory of course! I really should have saved the actual transcripts, it would have saved me a lot of time!)
So after showing her my tongue, I was able to briefly resume a regular conversation, but then she disconnected. Then I had this conversation with a man. I won’t fill out what he was doing, what I said will probably make it clear.
Me: So how are you?
Me: Why aren’t you replying?
Me: What are you doing?
Me: Oh I see.
Me: Please put that away.
Me: Don’t do that!
Me: How about we forget about this and have a nice normal conversation?
Me: I’m not gay, you know? I’m not actually enjoying this at all. Actually, what I feel now is the opposite of enjoyment.
Me: So, you don’t even care? That’s really inconsiderate!
Me: Please stop.
At this point I disconnected.
So these are two more horrifying stories that show just why you should never use ChatRoulette, Omegle or any other of these random chat sites. I still have other stories about these sites that I decided not to include as this entry is already pretty long, so maybe sometime in the future I’ll post my last few scary stories.