1999: Jet Force Gemini ¹
2000: Banjo-Tooie ²
2005: It’s Mr. Pants
Connected Series:
Footnotes:
For today’s new blog post, I am excited to tell you that I have had the opportunity to sit down with young and upcoming journalist, Voucher Monkey. We only had time for a brief chat, but here’s what we discussed.
Me: So when did you decide to go into journalism
Voucher Monkey: Well, it wasn’t really my choice. I was born in the wild, but then captured and forced to live in captivity. I was kept in a tiny cage in an office and secretly wrote one article to ruin the reputation of the business who captured me. It kind of went on from there.
Me: Oh, yes. That was the start of Ant and Dec Gate.
VM: Yeah, well that was supposed to be a real attack, you know? Something to say “look, you can’t keep me in a cage like this” but it completely misfired. Sure, people were angry, when I falsely reported that Ant and Dec had split, but they got so much traffic on the site that it was basically just a good thing. They even gave me a job.
Me: And how do you feel about you job?
VM: Well, I mean, obviously I prefer to be out of the cage doing something than in the cage gathering dust, but, man, its a depressing life. One fake news article a week… It’s not very fulfilling.
Me: Do you wish you had more to write?
VM: Well, I just think I get taken for granted. I mean, it’s a miracle I can talk, let alone the fact that I have a strong enough grasp of human culture to be able to write weekly, topical pieces of clickbait.
Me: Did you feel underappreciated before the articles too?
VM: Definitely. You know what they were going to do before that article was a success? They were gonna have me put to sleep. Yeah, they were gonna f-[removed]-ing kill me, man.
Me: And what can we expect from you in future?
VM: I don’t know. The future is what the future is. I don’t know how much longer I can do this fake news-gig. I want to lash out at the world, but it just doesn’t feel as satisfying when people want you to lash out. This has become my whole identity. You know, back before all this, I was never called Voucher Monkey. I’m not even a monkey! Nobody even stops to ask if I’m male or female. It’s like I’m nothing but a gag. Day after day I sit in that cage and they’ll bring me out and make me dance, then they’ll put me back in and then make me write an article. I don’t want any of that. I just want to be free, you know? Running through the jungle. With my people. But it will never happen.
Me: Thanks for your time, I hope your career will take you to a happier place soon.
That was really quite a sad experience, to be honest. The creative industry does seem to take its toll on some. Let’s hope that things are happier for Voucher Monkey soon!
(Don’t miss today’s Finger Puppet Show!)
Conker the Squirrel. He was the friend of Diddy Kong. His birthday was once ruined by the Evil Acorn. Nobody could ever have imagined the strange turn his life would take in Conker’s Bad Fur Day.
Aesthetically, this game is just like a lot of other Rare platformers of the time. It looks like Donkey Kong 64 or Banjo-Kazooie and a lot of people might have expected it to be similar in tone too, but it’s not. It’s really not. Personally, I find it amazing that these things are all connected.
So how’s it different? Well, you see, this game is very adult. At first, you might think that the only thing which sets this apart is that it features crude humour and has characters swearing, but there’s so much more to it. The story is often very dark and even profound. I don’t really want to say too much about what happens in the game, because it’s often quite effective because of how unexpected most of what happens is. Sometimes you’ll laugh out loud at the humour, other times you’ll be stunned by something absolutely harrowing.
But beyond the huge range in story, there’s also a huge range in gameplay. Sometimes it will be the platforming you’re used to from Rare. Sometimes it will be a third person shooter. Sometimes it will be survival horror. Things never get dull and there are a ton of movie pastiches along the way too. Occasionally, however, the controls are slightly frustrating, but thankfully not too often. There’s also a multiplayer death match mode for up to four people, which was a nice little addition, but not much more than a bonus, in my eyes.
One thing I found especially interesting about Conker’s Bad Fur Day is how Conker evolved as the story went along. Conker is a very flawed person, but we get to see him progress somewhat throughout the duration of the game. I also found that I really disliked him at times, because many of his actions were just plain awful, but it was always interesting to see how he’d react to the situations he found himself in.
I also want to take a moment to say that Conker’s world felt really beautiful and I really enjoyed exploring it. I know it only has Nintendo 64 era graphics, but I think that just adds to the charm. With all the natural scenery, peaceful sound effects and the fantastic soundtrack, the world of Conker’s Bad Fur Day was a delight to explore.
Overall this game was a masterpiece. It’s very sad to think that it isn’t better known. I know it may appear to just be something that just childishly makes cartoon animals swear in an attempt to be funny (and I’ll admit, there were one or two bits of sexual humour which were too ‘on the nose’ for me), but it’s got so much more depth to it and is definitely worth a try. One of Rare’s best games.
Rating: 9.8/10
(Don’t miss today’s Finger Puppet Show!)
I recently decided that I should try to go swimming at least once a week. Not only is this a good form of exercise (which I need more of) but it also helps me to combat my disliking of being undressed around others. It is exercise for the mind and body all at once! However, things didn’t go quite so smoothly the first time I went.
The Bath swimming pool, if you ask me, is a little hard to navigate; once I’d stepped out of the men’s changing room, it wasn’t clear to me where I should go to find the pool. I slowly wandered forward and wondered if I was heading in the right direction. As I was wearing only my swimming costume, I was worried about coming out in the reception area or something.
Eventually a passed a woman. I noticed she was looking in my direction, so I looked towards her and smiled (as you do when you notice a stranger looking at you.) I then carried on slowly walking in that same direction. Oddly, I noticed that that woman was still looking right at me. I looked to her again to give her another friendly smile and this time I noticed that she was frowning at me. Why was this? Had I done something wrong?
I noticed that I had missed something crucial. The woman who was staring at me was actually naked. Then I realised I’d wandered into the woman’s changing room. I gave an apologetic smile, apologised and quickly turned around. A little while later I found the pool. As I swam, I kept worrying I’d get in trouble for what had happened and be asked to leave – I also couldn’t help but feel bad about my inadvertent invasion of that woman’s privacy! Thankfully, future visits have been less eventful. Since then, I’ve noticed the women’s changing room has been much more clearly signposted.
1990: Super Mario World ¹
1992: Super Mario Kart ²
1995: Super Mario World 2: Yoshi’s Island
1995: Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy’s Kong Quest ³
1996: Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars ⁴
1996: Super Mario 64 ⁵
1996: Donkey Kong Land 2 ⁶
1996: Mario Kart 64 ⁷
1997: Game & Watch Gallery ⁸
1997: Yoshi’s Story
1998: Mario Party ⁹
1999: Super Smash Bros. ¹⁰
1999: Mario Golf ¹¹
2000: Paper Mario ¹²
2001: Mario Kart: Super Circuit ¹³
2001: Super Smash Bros. Melee ¹⁴
2002: Super Mario Sunshine ¹⁵
2003: Mario Kart: Double Dash!! ¹⁶
2003: Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga ¹⁷
2004: Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door ¹⁸
2004: Super Mario 64 DS ¹⁹
2004: Yoshi’s Universal Gravitation
2005: Mario Kart DS ²⁰
2006: Tetris DS ²¹
2008: Super Smash Bros. Brawl ²²
2008: Mario Kart Wii ²³
2009: New Super Mario Bros. Wii ²⁴
2010: Super Mario Galaxy 2 ²⁵
2011: Puzzle Swap ²⁶
2011: Mario Kart 7 ²⁷
2012: Animal Crossing: New Leaf ²⁸
2012: Nintendo Land ²⁹
2012: New Super Mario Bros. U ³⁰
2013: New Super Luigi U ³¹
2014: Mario Kart 8 ³²
2014: Super Smash Bros. for Nintendo 3DS ³³
2015: Yoshi’s Woolly World
2015: Super Mario Maker ³⁴
2016: Minecraft ³⁵
2016: Super Mario Maker for Nintendo 3DS ³⁶
2016: Super Mario Run ³⁷
Parent Series:
Connected Series:
Footnotes:
Today was a sad day because today was the day that Earl Hamner died. Since I read his book Spencer’s Mountain in 2009, he has been my favourite author (or at least one of them, it fluctuates a bit) and I also enjoyed hearing him narrate every episode of The Waltons and knowing that he was the real-life version of John-Boy Walton, one of my favourite fictional characters. In 2013, I wrote a short personal essay called “Why The Waltons is Wonderful” and it was included in a book which was given to him on his 90th birthday. After that he sent me, and the other contributors, a lovely thank you via email. In the email he said that if any of us ever happened to be in his area, he would buy us dinner. Living in the UK, I thought my chances of being in his area were, sadly, quite low, but I always hoped that I would one day be able to take him up on that kind offer. Having dinner with people is probably my favourite thing to do, so you can image how much I would enjoy having dinner with one of my heroes! I also emailed him and asked whether he’d like to write a Trusty Water Blog post about writing and he said he was very busy, but he’d get around to it when he had a chance. Just a day or two ago a friend suggested I should send him another email. Of course, my connection to him is minimal, but I’m still very sad to know he’s no longer around. Still, his story, his life and his work will continue to inspire me.
Sabre Wulf is one of the very early games made by Rare during their Ultimate Play the Game days. You play as Sabreman and have to find four pieces of an amulet in order to escape from a labyrinthine jungle (avoiding the titular Sabre Wulf in the process.)
First things first, I just want to say, I love this game. It may be old and simple, but it’s fun and that’s what’s most important. The game allows you to move around in all directions and you’re essentially exploring a massive maze. Something about the old graphics (with a lot of black) helped to set the feeling of the mysterious jungle for me. There’s also no background music (just blips for sound effects) and I also think that that helps to set the tone of a secluded jungle.
The jungle is pretty huge and you may find it hard to find everything, but I think the difficulty added to my enjoyment. It never really felt too hard, but was satisfyingly difficult. Having said that, there were occasionally things which were a bit unfair: for example, Sabreman’s controlling is ever so slightly slidey, which occasionally meant that I died because he moved further forward than I wanted him to.
Throughout the jungle, you’ll find animals (like rhinos and hippos), deadly insects and a hostile tribe of people. There’s also the unstoppable Sabre Wulf, which is always after you. Of course, to keep himself safe, Sabreman has a trusty sabre which he can use to destroy smaller threats and to keep people and bigger animals at bay. There are also various plants you can eat, each of which have different effects on you and make you immune to the damage of enemies.
When you first play, it might feel too hard (and I certainly felt that way), but after a few tries you should get into the swing of things. It has no save feature (other than scores) so you’ll have to do it in on sitting, unless you’re playing an emulation, such as the one in Rare Replay. Other than a few things like that, for a game of its age, this is very good indeed and I feel like later (more popular) titles, such as The Legend of Zelda, owe it a lot.
Rating: 8/10
Buy it here as part of Rare Replay.
(Don’t miss today’s Finger Puppet Show!)
I’m sure for most writers out there, a writing job would be their dream form of employment. But, while I don’t doubt that it would be a perfect situation for some people, I also think that some writers may not like to have writing jobs and I am going to use this blog post to explain why.
I work full time as a writer and write thousands of words at work every single day. I write articles and generic text for web pages. When I get home I often experience the feeling of being “all written out” which leaves me less motivated to continue my personal writing pursuits. I’m quickly writing this blog post out now just before bed, for example, because I wasn’t exactly motivated for writing when I got home (since I had just been writing for hours already.)
So I think that there’ll be a lot of writers out there who might be better off if they didn’t have writing jobs. Let’s face it, most of the writing jobs that are going around are the kind of work that I do and there are probably only a small few who consider that a “dream” piece of writing work. You might then be doing that piece of less than ideal writing and pouring all of your creative energy into that and then not able to do your own projects.
Having said that, I certainly wouldn’t want any other job. Even though a lot of what I do is written in a very uncreative buisness-like tone, I still get the occasional opportunity to be very creative and I am very grateful for that. Even if I had much fewer opportunities for creativity in my work, it would still be a lot more than in something like answering telephones as a receptionist. While I would do other work, the creative freedom I have every day means that my work never truly feels like “work” and while a lot of my creative energies may be spent, I feel that it is a small price to pay. This is just something to keep in mind if you’re thinking of going into writing.
You may have noticed that I’ve posted a few video game archive pages along with my regular posts recently and I just wanted to take a moment to explain what I’m doing. As you may or may not know, thanks to a good friend of mine, I got a proper domain for my blog and also made the transition from Weebly to WordPress – having made this change, I am also reworking the archiving for my video game reviews (click “Video Game Reviews” to see how it’s shaping up) – a side affect of this is that it means these archive posts occasionally end up in the main feed.
I know that writing reviews is the kind of generic content that a lot of people like to write, but I like to think that my own have a somewhat unique edge. With my special pages which list all of the reviews and show how the different video game series are linked together, I hope to reflect the very interconnected way that I look at all art mediums. I try out a lot of new things when I find out that they have some kind of connection to something I know and like already and I hope this method for reviewing will encourage people to try new things too. Right now, I only do it with video games, but I’d like one day to have some kind of interconnected review collection for all media… It will take a lot of time to think out the best system though. I also need to start posting book reviews more regularly. Anyway, basically, I just wanted to explain why archives were being posted here for now!
(Don’t miss today’s Finger Puppet Show!)
After successful games on the NES, SNES, Game Boy and where ever else, the Battletoads series was given a little bit of a finale with Battletoads Arcade. Gameplay is roughly similar to the earlier games, but it tries harder to be bigger and better than them.
As always, the majority of the levels have you beating up loads of enemies as you try to get through levels. This is fun and this time it’s especially entertaining because the violence is absurdly over the top. Now the toads will pin down enemies and bash their faces in until loads of blood starts squirting everywhere. Yeah. It’s ridiculous. It’s hilarious.
The different levels often present different kinds of gameplay (for example, one time you’re flying with jetpacks, another you’re shooting enemies from within a vehicle) but generally it’s just fighting and it feels like there’s less variation than in previous games. This, for me, made the game occasionally feel a little boring. On the other hand, three-person co-op is always an option, which is nice.
One thing I have to say about this game is that if you ever try to play it in an arcade, you’re going to have to spend a fortune if you want to get to the end. The game was intentionally designed to kill you constantly, because there are bullets and enemies flying everywhere. This isn’t really a problem when playing an emulation like in Rare Replay because you’re given infinite continues, but I’m very sorry for your loss if you want to play “authentically.”
Overall, this is a fun game and I couldn’t help but smile at the ridiculously over the top violence and action. Occasionally things like bosses might begin to feel a bit tedious when they kill you constantly and the game does rather feel a bit short, but it’s still a good experience. Rating: 7/10
(Don’t miss today’s Finger Puppet Show!)
